For years, there have been rumours of a different Dom Barker.
A Dom with a ferocious forehand. A devastating backhand. A man capable of producing the kind of table tennis normally associated with the sport's great entertainers.
There was always one problem with these reports.
Nobody was ever there to see it.
In practice, behind closed doors, The Doctor was apparently capable of absolutely anything. Put three opponents, a scorecard and actual witnesses in front of him, however, and the transformation could become a little more complicated.
On Monday night, with DCA Flyers visiting Bugbrooke Community Centre, something extraordinary happened.
The Doctor finally performed in public.
The result was an 8–2 Badgers victory. The story was considerably better than the scoreline.
A fairly unconvincing opening consultation
Unfortunately, Dom's first appointment was with Martin Hall.
Martin is a familiar figure in the other Premier Division too. Only twelve days earlier, he'd represented Greenleys Monarchs against Yardley Titans and watched Nick Howard win three remarkably similar 11–9 games.
He was clearly still an awkward customer, whatever county happened to be hosting him.
Against Dom, Hall attacked well and won 11–9, 11–7 and 11–5. Three games. No complications. A rather abrupt end to the opening consultation.
The Doctor's much-vaunted practice-room genius appeared, once again, to be suffering from a shortage of public evidence.
For a while.
The operation was a complete success
Next came Ameya Pathak, a player blessed with lovely touch and the sort of powerful forehand smash that can end a rally before anyone has finished admiring the previous shot.
Ameya's timing never quite settled on this particular evening. Dom, by contrast, appeared to discover a switch that had been hidden somewhere in his bat handle.
11–3. 11–4. 11–5.
Three games to Dom, with just twelve points conceded. Forehand firing, backhand flowing, and absolutely no need to ask the audience to leave the building first.
But the SCORE data reveals something even more remarkable.
In the second game, Dom found himself 4–1 down. What followed was an extraordinary sequence of TEN consecutive points, transforming that deficit into an 11–4 victory.
Ten points. Unanswered.
At that stage, Ameya might reasonably have requested a second opinion.
The Doctor hadn't merely found his form. He'd discovered a revolutionary new treatment: removing the opposition from the scoreboard entirely.
Perhaps it was a one-off. Perhaps somebody had slipped the wrong player onto court.
Then came Darren Ward.
Darren took the opener 11–7. The old fears returned. Was the consultation about to be cancelled?
Not this time. Dom fought back 11–8 and 11–9, then finished with an 11–2 fourth game that left rather little room for argument.
Two singles wins, one excellent recovery and a genuinely complete attacking display. The man who usually specialises in keeping the ball on the table had discovered that he could also finish a point with some authority.
If this was a rare public sighting of the full Barker repertoire, those present had witnessed something special.
The Clubhouse Performance of the Season committee — currently consisting of everyone who has heard Nick tell the story — has already made its recommendation.
Martin Hall: same opponent, different division, considerably more trouble
Hall was not finished with the Badgers after dispatching Dom. Facing El Capitan, he offered a much sterner examination than the three 11–9 games he'd lost against Nick in Milton Keynes.
Martin stormed through the opener 11–4. Howard took the next two 11–7 and 11–5, but the Flyers man forced a fifth by taking the fourth 11–8.
Nick eventually came through 11–6 in the decider.
A victory, certainly. But considerably less of a stroll than the captain's official communications department would have preferred.
And the man with a historical fondness for enormous 'CHO!' and 'BOOM!' celebrations had at least found something worth making noise about.
Two games up. What could possibly go wrong?
Nick's match against Darren began encouragingly enough: 11–5 and 11–8. The captain was two games up and might reasonably have begun mentally preparing the post-match victory speech.
Darren had other plans.
The Flyers player fought his way back with 11–8 and 11–9 wins. Suddenly, the match was heading into a deciding fifth.
But the most extraordinary part was still to come.
With the score at 10–8 in the fifth, El Capitan held two match points. Two opportunities to finish the contest, secure another victory and begin composing the customary self-congratulatory press release.
He took neither.
Instead, Darren won four consecutive points, overturning the deficit to claim the decider 12–10.
Four points. Two match points squandered. One spectacularly uncomfortable defeat.
The Clubhouse Headband Performance Committee has declined to comment, although an internal review of the equipment's effectiveness under pressure is reportedly underway.
Credit to Darren, whose determined comeback from two games down earned the Flyers a thoroughly hard-fought point.
Howard could at least console himself with a four-game victory over Ameya, although even that wasn't without its complications.
The fourth game eventually finished 15–13, but the SCORE point history reveals that Ameya saved an extraordinary six match points before Nick finally converted his seventh opportunity.
Six.
By the time the winning point arrived, El Capitan had presumably exhausted several victory celebrations, reconsidered his life choices and begun wondering whether the headband came with a manufacturer's warranty.
Ameya's refusal to surrender was admirable. Nick's eventual victory was greeted with the sort of relief normally reserved for finding your passport at the airport.
The headband remains in excellent condition. Whether it has considered offering tactical advice is currently unknown.
Cue Ball quietly clocks in
While his team-mates explored the full range of human emotion, Adrian 'The Polish Pistol' Piotrowski adopted his customary approach.
Win the matches. Keep the paperwork tidy. Try not to get drawn into the theatre.
He recovered from dropping the opening game against Ameya to win 3–1, then beat Martin Hall and Darren Ward in straight games.
Another singles hat-trick for the Badgers' talisman.
Adrian then partnered Nick to dispatch Ameya and Martin 11–8, 11–3 and 11–4 in the doubles, adding the final point of the night.
Three singles wins and a doubles victory. At this stage, Adrian might reasonably ask why everyone else insists on making the sport so complicated.
For followers of the Badgers' Swedish doubles mythology, a clarification: the self-appointed Waldner and Persson partnership was merely off duty. No international incident has been declared.
The Clubhouse verdict
Bugbrooke Badgers 8. DCA Flyers 2.
It was a competitive evening with plenty to admire from the visitors. Hall's attacking play earned a valuable singles win and pushed Howard to five games. Darren produced a terrific comeback from two games down. Ameya's touch and attacking weapons were evident even on a night when the results refused to fall his way.
For Bugbrooke, Adrian supplied the expected excellence, Nick contributed two singles wins and the doubles, and Dom provided something considerably more memorable than his opening scoreline suggested.
The Doctor had lost his first singles in straight games. He finished with two terrific victories, a display of forehand and backhand attacking that had previously been the stuff of private legend, and a thoroughly deserved claim to the Badgers' standout performance of the season so far.
There were witnesses. There was a scorecard. There was even a captain prepared to admit somebody else had stolen the show.
The Doctor is in. And this time, the surgery doors were open.